Thoughts About Zombies
I like zombie movies. I’m not preparing for a zombiepocalypse, but I do know that you have to shoot their head off, etc.
However, zombies are not real and my knowledge of knowing to sever their head is meaningless. That’s why The Zombie Survival Guide is still on a Barnes and Noble bookshelf and not on mine. Because zombies are not real.
Preparing for such a zombiepocalypse is like preparing for a unicorn ranch. How do you know what a unicorn likes? What kind of authority does Lisa Frank have over the unicornverse? For all I know, unicorns might fart out fire and burn the barn to the ground. That definitely wasn’t covered in the Lisa Frank handbook because they’ve never encountered one before. Because they’re not real.
So if zombies did rise from the earth to wreak havoc and you shot them through their brains, they’re going to grow another head right away and kill you. They might grow two heads to replace the one you just took out. Who’s to argue? I doubt your survival guide covered that part.
No one knows what’ll happen because they’re not real. So everyone, please relax. I’m all for zombie fun and zombie hahas, but this is getting out of hand.
